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Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Your what is pierced?

So I have dated.  Plenty Of Fish has helped with that.  I have dated a fireman, someone who didn't match his profile pic, boys who are the same age, a man who had the same name as me(!?), one who was six years younger, a guy who alluded his penis was pierced, some have been five plus years older and some never even made it to an actual date, just texting. One first date lasted 45 minutes. The longest lasted 12 hours.  I have tried to date local, Kanata being the furthest but I did see one from Kingston.  Oh and the texting relationship, gone bad, was with a teacher from Brockville.  Staying local means I have dated a few Dads from Barrhaven.  Barrhaven is NOT big.
I admit some did not end well.   Many were at a time when I was hoping for more and have made some mistakes from the past, ignoring red flags.  Recently I listened to my gut(she is so smart) and called the dating done after two weeks.  Still a disappointment.  There is a reason the relationship gets going and leads to a second and then another. We did have much in common, yet not enough to keep it going.  Best advice I got from a boy, "Slow down".  Yet we aren't 20ish and after the crap I have been through I now know what I want.
Then the flip side...
I have dated a couple of men who look great on paper but if I am not attracted to them... I can't make anything happen.  It put me in the other position... 
A few have remained friends.

I have perfected the first date.  It is like an interview. Ask them a bunch of questions. They sure do like to talk about themselves:). 
Online dating has been a surreal experience.  Very very different from the last time I dated.  
I can recall months before getting divorced watching an eHarmony commercial thinking I couldn't even imagine dating at my age.  Fast forward six months and I am writing my profile for!
Online dating is very catalogue like.  Scroll through your "matches", wink, smile or wave at one of them and maybe they will do the same back.  Or you can message them asking questions based on their profile. You can choose to message many or just a few.  Message a bit via the website and then it usually moves to texting and then perhaps a date.
I am guilty, at times, of reciting the next dates name over and over before getting to the coffee shop or restaurant.  Not good if you call him the wrong name!  Ya there have been a few dates. 
Also there is the experience of dating someone and you go back on your dating website and you can see they are online too.  Still looking? I have learned to multi  task  in this area of my life too.

Obviously, none have "matured" into anything more then a month of dating.  I am currently frustrated and taking a break from the online dating world...but not done with dating!
My next profile pics?!?!

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