How religion turned me off of religion

For myself I do not feel a religion is necessary.

Let me explain:  I went to a Catholic school my entire school career (excluding university).  Why? because it was the one school that would pick us up by bus in our area.  I stayed during high school because I had my group of friends.

This experience taught me a lot.

Elementary school was the catalyst for turning me off religion. When you are told by your teacher (she was a peach wrote her a letter read it here) that you will never go to Heaven therefore in a child's mind, I would be going to HELL.  Sequestered for the big religious events (I understand as a non-Catholic I could not make First Communion or Confirmation but I just feel it should have been handled in a more positive way, rather than not saying anything.  Really felt looked down upon)and spoken to like you are dumb by your friend's mom because you might not understand the play Joesph and Technicolour Dream Coat -- uh hello I do go to a Catholic school and actually listen.

Yet I did get peer pressured to go to Confession in grade 4 for the first time with my classmates...and I lied in Confession?!?!?  Also in Grade 4 my teacher (more about him here) let me try the Eucharist out of the bag of them in his desk...it was ok they weren't blessed.  Not sure about the Eucharist my friend gave me...after she'd gone up at Mass??? For that perhaps I should not be going to Heaven.

High school was not so negative and self esteem crushing.  I had two amazing friends who attended Church every Sunday but were the least judgmental.  They were very open to discussing every aspect of the Catholic religion including its "faults".  They walked the walk yet embraced me as their forever friend (xoxxox) 

But

....in high school I had another experience with a different religion.  Not a positive one at all.  It was with one of my fellow non-Catholic friends.  She invited me to a weekend camp with her Pentacostal church.  Mass was very different than what I had already experienced through my schooling.  People talking in tongues, yelling out and in the end I really felt like I was brought there to be recruited.

As an adult, one of my children is baptised and the other is not.  I have met other religious friends and we are respectful of each other.  I pray, I try to treat others as I would like to be treated, there is Karma, and I feel closest to God when I am in nature.

Then I get this:
Stuck to the handle of my car in the winter time.  I thought it was a ticket at first for parking early in an area that started free parking at 5...I parked at 4:30

I Have not googled this yet?!?!

I just laughed.

I am better because of you

Dear Mrs Smith

I am writing you to thank you for making me a better teacher...I think?  You were my grade six teacher at Georges Vanier.  I was an awkward 11/12 year old girl who was the definition of introvert.  I had a close group of friends and a did pretty good academically.  You might want to take credit for the academics but your methods weren't what I needed.  You'd pick me out to answer questions when my hand wasn't raised. To some this probably wouldn't really phase them

but to me it made me anxious and stressed. You yelled a lot and used intimidation to keep control of the class. No you didn't yell necessarily at me.  And the desk that you threw wasn't at me but I am sure Kevin hasn't forgotten it.  

I shared the same name as your son. You'd think that would give us a unique bond...? But I guess me being one of the none Catholics in the class didn't help my case. Still not an excuse to ignore me when I saw you by the canal and I waved a huge HELLO. Come on we both there to see the Pope float by in his bullet proof boat. Your behaviour not so Catholic like:(. Or even better is when my friend, on my behalf, asked what would happen if one was not baptized? "You won't go to Heaven." So as a grade six student you left me to believe I was going to Hell.  That's fine now, I have you to thank for completely turning me off religion.

I believe I missed more days at school that year than I had ever and I spent many mornings begging not to go to school, oh and headaches to boot.

Your techniques of us beating a pillow with a bat and yelling out what made us angry...were interesting?! By the way I made all mine up and would have never yelled that it was you, the only black cloud in my life at that time.

Again I thank you for making me a better teacher.  Yes I admit I can be a firm teacher and I do not "connect" with all of my students.  the ones that I don't immediately, I make a conscious effort to take time and speak one on one and find a special connection.  I do this because I don't want to be the teacher the student remembers as a "mean" "angry" teacher that everyone feared getting.

As an adult I saw you at Farm Boy.  I did not say hi. I didn't say anything.  I became that scared pre teen fighting an anxiety attack.

In the end I did learn a lot from you.  

Karma

Sincerely 

Ms Smith

Tim W do you remember Grade 4?

So if you were to ask me my best year of elementary school I would choose Grade 4 at Georges Vanier in Kanata.

I, along with my best friend at the time, were the teacher's pet.  We got to stay in at recess and hangout in the classroom.

Our teacher was Mr Guerin, Steve Guerin.

My parents even had him over for dinner. My Mom made grasshopper pie.  It was a big deal.

What I remember about him was that he'd also been a nurse and a private detective.  He owned guns.  He might have  lived at home with his Mom and brother?  In my eyes he was a cool relaxed teacher that gave us freedom but still got what needed to be taught. Every gym class he'd play Abracadabra by the Steve Miller Band

Many years later this happened :

Member: Stephen Robert Guerin
Registration Number: 162134
Decision: Resignation and Cancellation
A panel of the Discipline Committee held a public hearing on October 20, 2003 into allegations of professional misconduct and incompetence against Stephen Robert Guerin, also known as Stephen Christopher Hart.
Guerin, 48, was certified to teach in 1979 and was employed by the Peterborough-Victoria-Northumberland and Newcastle Roman Catholic District School Board. Guerin chose not to attend the hearing nor to be represented by counsel.
Guerin faced 10 allegations of professional misconduct related to his criminal conviction on charges of weapons offences, possession of child pornography and the use of forged documents.
The panel heard evidence that Guerin used fraudulent qualifications in his application for a teacher's certificate, which was granted to him in the name of Stephen Christopher Hart, and that he also used forged documents in applying for employment as a teacher.
Guerin pleaded guilty in criminal court to charges of possession of child pornography, relating to possession of approximately 4,000 photographic images stored on his computer and sexually explicit movies involving children.
In March 2003 he pleaded guilty to criminal charges of using forged documents, carrying a concealed weapon, storing firearms in a careless manner and failing to report the loss of firearms. Guerin was sentenced to five months in jail, in addition to the eight-and-a-half months he had already been incarcerated, and three years probation.
The panel received an agreed statement of facts in which Guerin admitted to the allegations and pleaded guilty to professional misconduct. He agreed to surrender his Certificates of Qualification and Registration immediately. Guerin also agreed to never teach again in any public or private school in Ontario or elsewhere and to never seek reinstatement in the College.
The decision of the panel appears on the College's public register.

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I still hold on to my memories but definitely tainted.